Last week was a really hectic week. Scoutily hectic.
LAST Wednesday -
I was selected to prepare for the UG orientation.
Build the tower till 8pm.
Left half an hour earlier than the latest.
LAST Thursday -
The orientation was a disaster; fugg the rain.
Dumb part - sec4s slacking in the den while sec3s doing the shit crap talking.
Dumber part - The I/C wanted to leave thinking he had nothing to do.
Smart part - I fugged the I/C till he changed his mind.
Sad part - Nobody seemed interested in scouts.
Well u see orientation for scouts had always been more of a practical thing than theory thing, meaning people would be interested to climb the tower and stuff rather than listen to us talk about knots and pioneering. And since we could not do that, none of the sec1s were interested.
Gosh, i guess we are bad liars huh?
Stayed till the end; about 6pm.
LAST Friday -
Thank God i brought my buret.
Wasted time as we waited for the sec1s who never came; for a reason which i find fugging dumb.
Wasted time as we did an extra long patrol corner.
Did not waste time as we brought down the 'useless' tower quickly.
For the bringing out of a hell lot of poles, some which were not needed, wasting time?
I dont know. U tell me.
And i went to play pool with Lennon, Belmond and Xian Yi once more at around 7pm, after training ended of course.
I was seriously not into the mood. Too exhausted. Bleh.
I reached home in time for a good-enough night's rest for energy for the next fugging long day.
LAST Saturday -
I have to emphasize on the time i stayed in SJI.
Came at about 0745 hours.
Left at about 2130 hours.
Thats about 13 hours and 45 minutes.
Minus half an hour lunch break and other mini breaks, at least 12 hours of bloody work.
Yes, i'm whining, and i think i deserve to.
Lets see...
Why did i leave so late?
Mainly because of the amount of poles tower had to keep, and partly because we had to clean up the shit for bridge.
Who else left so late?
3 ventures.
3 secondary 3s.
2 secondary 4s.
Tower - 1
Bridge - 3
Gateway - 1
Eh, unless u have a maid, learn to clean up ur own shit please. U shouldnt expect ur neighbours to do it for u right?
I can copy and paste the post on the previous Saturday, but that wouldnt be neccessary since the point isnt entirely the same.
Today, i'm disappointed. Seriously disappointed.
U tell me u have tution, u tell me ur parents are here, u tell me u got homework, u tell me u got dental appointment. Hey, i'm telling u those are just excuses, if i paid u a million dollars, u would sacrifice ur crap for scouts.
It only shows that u weigh ur tutions, homework, dental appointment, and all the most slightest and dumbest reasons as more important stuff than scouts.
I would excuse a sec2.
But sec3s, bloody future leaders of the unit, cant u start sucking up and working hard for what u want in future?
But sec4s, leaders of the unit, if u are the last resort and u are not around when needed, do u expect the poles to magically disappear into the store?
I wish u guys were like the previous Saturday.
I'm a Secondary 4. My O levels are this year. I have not done a single homework for the entire of last week or revised for a damn thing. My studies are starting to screw up. I have tution from 10am-12pm every Saturday. My mum comes to pick me up sometimes when i dont ask her to, and I am sorry to say i always have to make her wait.
Why? Because I have my principles.
If everyone thinks like those people who leaves early, what will happen? Chaos.
However, if everyone has more or less the correct principles, we might end way earlier and everyone would be equally tired, which is fair.
That is what its supposed to be.
Upon reflection I have also come to realise one more thing.
Somehow, i feel that i'm not appreciated in the Unit, not in NSPC but in general.
I can list some examples, but not here.
I do feel stupid for putting in so much effort sometimes, when i dont get appreciated, otherwise when i dont get the respect or the credit which i deserve more than the other party.
Sometimes, when i want to do something, i would think twice. How would this benefit me? Am i wasting my time?
I know that i should be instead thinking how would this benefit the Unit. But in the end of the day when u suffer so much while everyone else rejoice and u, in the end, are not appreciated, dont u feel stupid and remorse for doing it?
I'm not exactly selfish, but i think i should be, since everyone else is.
It doesnt pay to be kind, it just pays if ure not stupid.
Its about time i seriously start learning to balance up between CCA and studies.
But can i bare to see those few poor, hungry, selfless souls suffering while i enjoy my TV, bed, and aircon with a belly full of food?- thats another question.